Month: August 2008

My soul is provoked

This morning, I directed the media at IHOP while Lou Engle shared his testimony and some dreams about the next TheCall meeting in San Diego this November 1st. I was so provoked, I couldn’t help but cry and pray. He petitioned us to go on a 40-day fast for the state of California starting September 24.

When I returned home, I listened to a Delirious? album named “The Mission Bell”. Their song named “Take Off My Shoes” really ministered to me. I am amazed why Jesus would want to wash my feet.

Take Off My Shoes

I’ll take off my shoes, I’m coming in,
Untie this rope, I’m staying with him,
Love of my life, I’ll live and die,
Just for the moments for my king and I.

Why did you call, why did you wait,
For someone so guilty, someone so fake.
There are no words for my beautiful song,
Now I’m in the arms of my beautiful one.

Hold me, blow all the pride from my bones, with your fire.
Hold me, breathe on this heart made of stone, keep it pure.
Hold me, saviour of heaven and earth, King forever.
Hold me, love of my life lead me on, Through the fire, lead me on…

I’ll take off this crown and fall at your feet,
The secret of joy are the moments we meet.
How could a man with all of your fame,
Pull me from darkness and call me by name.

So hold me today, as I carry your cross,
Into the desert to find who is lost.
Look at my hands, they’re still full of faith,
God keep them clean till we finish the race.

Written by Delirious? ©2005 Curious? Music UK

How to order my private world

I studied today once again how to order my private world. I don’t want to stand before God at the end of my life with regret on how I spent my time, energy, money, etc. I have decided during this fast to develop a discipline how to spend my time. I no longer want to wake up thinking, “What will I do with my spare time today?”. Planning every hour of my day is a must. If I won’t carefully plan it out, someone else or some circumstance will plan it for me. God give me grace (supernatural enablement) to pursue this.

Prayer for Catholic Charismatic fellowships in Poland

I have been praying for some time that God would break in on Catholic Charismatic fellowships in Poland. Iwona will be attending the 25th anniversary of a fellowship that she helped start called Hallelujah. The anniversary will take place October 4-11 in Wroclaw, Poland. If the funds come in, I would like our whole family to make the trip. I am praying that a fresh wind of renewal and revival would spread through the nation of Poland. That they would be a living example of what one of there own, John Paul ll, told the world to do.

A page taken from Hallelujah’s journal taken over two decades ago of some of the leaders. I put a yellow border around Iwona.

Center of Wroclaw, Poland

John Paul ll, in 2000, called all parishes to become schools of prayer and places where “training in holiness” is given.

Our Christian communities must become genuine “schools” of prayer, where the meeting with Christ is expressed not just in imploring help but also in thanksgiving, praise, adoration, contemplation, listening and ardent devotion, until the heart truly “falls in love”… It would be wrong to think that ordinary Christians can be content with a shallow prayer that is unable to fill their whole life.

He also cites several reasons why this turn to holiness of life and depth in prayer is important. Besides the fact that it is quite simply part and parcel of the Gospel message, he points out that the supportive culture of “Christendom” has virtually disappeared and that Christian life today has to be lived deeply, or else it may not be possible to live it at all.

Raccoon visitation

When my family and I were driving back to Kansas City, we stopped by a gas station and were welcomed by a large family of raccoons.  I ran inside to see what I could buy them.  I came out with 8 packs of donuts.  They rushed me as I started to distribute them outside the van.  After the second pack of donuts was gone, I began feeling a little uneasy with over a dozen wild raccoons all around my legs, putting their front paws on me as they stood on their hind legs begging for more. I then got in our van and videoed as we finished giving them the rest of the 50 donuts! Here is the video clip.

The Smithsonian and the Washington monument

Today my family and I spent all day at the Smithsonian Institution National Museum of Natural History, Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum, Smithsonian Lockheed Martin IMAX Theater & Einstein Planetarium and a tour at the top of the Washington Monument. It was quite a homeschooling adventure for the MajorChange Academy students (all 3 of them).

Hiking on the Potomac River – Great Falls Park

Do we go down town DC again or take a several mile nature hike at Great Falls park in McLean, VA? As the majority of the group were Central European (Polish), they won the vote. Nature hike is was. Located just 15 miles from the Nation’s capital, the Great Falls of the Potomac (so named by the first European colonists) is considered the most spectacular natural landmark in the DC metropolitan area. Here, the Potomac River builds up speed and force as it falls over a series of steep, jagged rocks and flows through a narrow gorge.

Great Falls Park stretches along almost 2 miles of the Virginia side of the Potomac providing a series of trails and overlooks from which to view the falls and the gorge. Administered by the National Park Service, Great Falls Park also preserves the remains of the Potowmack Canal. The canal was initiated by George Washington as a way to link the upper Potomac and the Ohio River Valley to Washington and the Chesapeake. Great Falls Park offers numerous recreational activities: bird watching, climbing, fishing, hiking, horseback riding, kayaking, nature walks, and whitewater rafting.

TheCall DC – photos

Day 40: Should I eat or continue?

Should I eat or continue? All my friends at IHOP are rejoicing about breaking their 40-fast today. I have lost 25 lbs. during this fast as well as other things in my soul and flesh. But I have been a little distracted during this fast because we have had guest from Poland staying at our house the ENTIRE time. Iwona and I have been cooking meals for them, driving them around, spending a lot of late nights talking with them. I really enjoy them, but during an extended fast you really start to draw inwardly and want to spend more time alone and read a lot more. I was not afforded that luxury this time.

Today, I took some Poles to Sweet Tomatoes for lunch after taking them shopping. The salad and soup looked so good, I decided to have a salad and soup.

It did not satisfy me. I am hungry and thirsty for more of God. I decided to “Press Delete” on that meal and continue with my fast. How long will I go? I don’t know right now. Maybe until I get a breakthrough. I yearn to be alone and alone with Him.

Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth – for your love is more delightful than wine. Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes; your name is like perfume poured out. No wonder the young women love You! Take me away with you – let us hurry! Song of Songs 1:1-4

Day 39: Finding God after a Long Search

Augustine, wanted to be a committed Christian, but he couldn’t get to resolve one issue in his life, which was the lust of the flesh. He was determined to leave his mistress, and to start a fully Christian life for some time, but he did not know how to break with this sin, which was captivating his life.

One day, Anthony’s friend, Simplicianus, came to visit, and shared a story about a famous Roman philosopher, Victorianus, who converted to Christianity, and publically acknowledged it. This impacted his life strongly, as some of the Christians in higher ranks of society were not public about their faith, fearing being ridiculed.

Soon afterwards another friend visited him, Ponticianus, who was a high official in the emperor’s court, a Christian. Seeing the apostle Paul’s writings on Augustine’s desk, he shared with Augustine news about Anthony, the Egyptian monk, who lived in a solitude in the desert and many others were following his lifestyle of prayer and fasting. He told him about two of his friends, “secret service agents” from the emperor’s court, who visited a Christian house and found a book talking about life of Anthony. Upon reading the stories form that book, they wondered:

“Tell me, I beg you, what goal are we seeking in all these toils of ours? What is that we desire?…Can our hopes in the court rise higher than to be ‘friends of the emperor’? …But if I choose to become a friend of God, see, I can become one now.”

They were so touched and changed just by reading this testimony of a hermit, that one of them exclaimed:

“… I enter into that service from this hour in this place.”

While Ponticianus was talking, Augustine felt an unusual urge to reconsider his life. He was fighting within himself, remembering his prayers and suffering. He somehow tried to compose himself by rejecting the grace which was falling upon him, but after Ponticianus’ departure, he went to his other friend and exclaimed:

“What is the matter with us? What is this? What did you hear? The uninstructed start up and take heaven, and we – with all our learning but so little heart – see how we follow in flesh and blood!!!”

He went outside to a garden and his soul was struggling within him to say the final FIAT to God, started to cry with tears and with his voice:

“Will You be angry forever? How long? How long? Tomorrow and tomorrow? Why not now? Why not this very hour make an end to my uncleanness?”

Suddenly he heard a voice of a child chanting over and over:

“Pick it up, read it”.

Quickly he opened apostles Paul’s writings and his eyes fell on the passage:

“Not in rioting and drunkenness, not in chambering and wantonness, not in strife and envying, but put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh to fulfill the lusts thereof.”

He was freed instantly. And that’s how the saint was born, know today as St. Augustine, one of the brightest minds and hearts of human kind.

Prayer on Finding God after a Long Search

by Augustine

Too late have I loved you, O Beauty so ancient, O Beauty so new. Too late have I loved you! You were within me but I was outside myself, and there I sought you! In my weakness I ran after the beauty of the things you have made. You were with me, and I was not with you. The things you have made kept me from you – the things which would have no being unless they existed in you! You have called, you have cried, and you have pierced my deafness. You have radiated forth, you have shined out brightly, and you have dispelled my blindness. You have sent forth your fragrance, and I have breathed it in, and I long for you. I have tasted you, and I hunger and thirst for you. You have touched me, and I ardently desire your peace.

all citations from “Confessions” by St. Augustine